CREATIVE WRITING

Don't know how I even came to think of this story...but I did. All the quotes, as the diary states, are from different songs/books/movies, and are technically plagiarism because I didn't put a bibliography in. Please don't sue me.

Dear John
No, that wasn't it
Dear Prudence
Neither, nope.
Ah right:

Dear Diary
Of course I knew this from the start you dimwit, I just love to annoy you.
No, you have no right of complaining. Writing in you is what I bought you for. I should’ve bought another book that doesn’t talk to me.
Yeah, tell me about it.
Anyway, you’re here to listen to me, capito? So, today was just an ordinary day. It always is
Stop complaining, I don’t give a damn on whether you’re bored or not. As far as I’m concerned, just go and commit suicide. If a diary can do this at all.
I’d buy another one, of course.
C’mon, now you are boring me. I mean, if I had to buy a talking diary I’ll of course just get the one that is not only hopelessly cynical, but also an idiot. Should’ve bought me a “kindred spirit” one, you know.
Plagiarism? I put inverted commas there, you see?
Sigh. Okay, not only is my diary an idiot, it’s also an idiot liking to act like a teacher.
You tell me about it. I can quote whoever I want.
Well, anyway. Then I met Jake in the cafeteria, that was the exciting part of it.
No, my life is NOT a teen movie. Shut it.
What? Invite him over and cook for him.
My diary is a sexist. Maybe I should print that on a t-shirt. They’d probably lock me up for it…
Ha-ha. I should lock you up somewhere and see how you like it.
The school bag is imprisonment? Yeah, well, you ARE a book after all. A stupid little notebook, that’s all you are.
And no, I don’t think the Geneva conventions are applicable to backwriting diaries.
What now, wanna cry about it?
I should get myself an internet diary, that’s what I should do. One where everyone can comment my stuff.
Of course I know there are many idiots on the internet, but no perverted freak can be worse that you and your damn remarks!
Well, what did I want to tell you? Ah yeah, about my day. Wonder why I should write about my day? Who cares for all this “got up ate breakfast and nothing ever happens round here” stuff?”
Certainly not you, I know.
No, I know it might be considered another quote but in this case, it’s just a coincidence.
No a CO-IN-CI-DENCE. Man, am I ever glad you’re a diary, or I’d have to spell everything out for you on a piece of paper.
Yes of course I do.
Blah.
Long plagiarism speeches just make my day*snore*. Such an interesting thing.
Come to think about it, dear diary. You might be considered as plagiarising, too.
No, it’s not something you said.
It’s something I read about once and- oh damn. You’re the bad guy, aren’t you?
Yeah, sure. Diaries are one day gonna rule the world.
Not you, anyway. You’re going to the trash bin. Right about now.
YES it was a quote.