Remember this one? I brought it as one of the two pieces of writing we were to hand in and was "forced" to read it out loud.
And, um...have a great August and merry Christmas, everyone. 
Twice Christmas
The first year
No one should be alone at a time like this. The dark outside that came so early and left so late, the gloomy weather- fog, rain, sleet – it was too easy to fall into a depression if you were alone. Sometimes she felt she was already there.
She sat cross-legged on the bed, which was covered with a light blue quilt. A little colour in a dark world. She stared out of the window, into a dark December evening. If only he were here. She knew that he wanted it just as well as she did. He was also feeling lonely, wanted to be with her. How she knew that, she was not certain, but she felt sure about it. If only this foolish notion that she was too good for him could be taken away.
The room was getting darker by the minute, and she knew that she was supposed to get up, turn on the lights or light a candle. Instead, she chose to walk over to the window and look down onto the street outside. People were passing by, carrying their Christmas shopping. They were huddled together in groups, or were walking in pairs. She felt like the only person in the world who was alone. When her landlord came walking up towards the house, she quickly retreated from the window, not wanting to be seen. He was a nice elderly gentleman, but she did not feel up to his cheerful stories about his family right now.
Family- maybe she could go and visit her parents. But then she remembered that they had gone to the ball her father’s employer was giving. Of course, this was a great opportunity for him, but nevertheless- she was feeling even lonelier when she realized that she would not be able to go and see her parents.
She laid down on her bed again, having turned on the colourful lamp on her desk. The lamp’s light always made her feel at home. If only he told her about how he really felt. Her thoughts kept returning to this problem. She wished he’d write honest words to her, and not repeat the same old phrases. Ever since that day in early summer, it had been like this. Before, he had always been honest to her, opened up to her. Sometimes she feared it had been her fault. If she had not confronted him with her love, they could still be friends now. “But that’s not what you want. It’s not enough.” a voice in her head whispered.
Christmas decorations started to glow outside. Christmas. When she had been a little girl, she had loved this time of the year more than any other. It was so full of secrets, of happiness, and wonderful, glittering colours. This year, she feared Christmas. She would be alone then, just as she was alone right now. She could go over to celebrate with her friends, but he would be there and somehow she did not feel up to facing him.
It was so dark.
****
The second year
Everything was full of lights. She stood on a stool before the window, attaching Christmas decorations and humming a Christmas song. He was sitting on the sofa, reading some scientific book or other. “You’re out of tune.” he said, looking up at her with a smile. “Can I help you with that?” “Humming?” she answered, jumping down from the stool. “I know, I know. I’m already done. What do you think?” He had probably noticed that she had glanced over from time to time.
Last year at the same time, she had been so deeply in the dark that she (had) would not have been able to dream of the happiness and anticipation she was feeling right now. Now the darkness of the winter evening was pressing against the window as well, just like it had done then. But now, it failed to depress her. It couldn’t come inside their little perfect world.
Ever since he had come around, after almost a year of making both of them miserable, nothing had really been able to depress her. She still could not believe her luck.
“What are you thinking about?” he asked her, indicating the place on the sofa beside him. “Come on and tell me.” “Nothing, really.” She could not word her feelings properly.
Everything was the opposite of last year. Instead of emptiness, everything was filled now. Filled with the herbal smell of the tea on the table, the smell of candles, and of course filled with light. Her life was full of light, as much as the room.
She went over to the sofa and snuggled up to him. Warmth was inside her now. From this distance, her decorations were looking even more festive, she pondered. This time, he seemed to have read her mind, because when she thought that, he put an arm around her, ran his fingers through her hair and whispered to her: “Your work is really beautiful. You should do the rest of the flat, too.” “Maybe tomorrow”, she mused. “Right now, I’ll just stay where I am.”
Christmas time was definitely her favourite time of the year, now she was again not dreading loneliness. Now she was looking forward to it again, as she had done when she had been little. Their first Christmas together.
She drifted into sleep without even really noticing it. Every feeling was so happy.
So full of light.
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